Goodbye Pittsburgh Part Three (The End)

“Always Coming Home”

Please bring strange things.

Please come bringing new things.

Let very old things come into your hands.

Let what you do not know come into your eyes.

Let desert sand harden your feet.

Let the arch of your feet be the mountains.

Let the paths of your fingertips be your maps

and the ways you go be the lines on your palms.

Let there be deep snow in your inbreathing

and your outbreath be the shining of ice.

May your mouth contain the shapes of strange words.

May you smell food cooking you have not eaten.

May the spring of a foreign river be your navel.

May your soul be at home where there are no houses.

Walk carefully, well loved one,

walk mindfully, well loved one,

walk fearlessly, well loved one.

Return with us, return to us,

be always coming home.

  – Ursula K. Le Guin

As it turns out, Pittsburgh wasn’t quite Burghtopia…and so this blog is done. Goodbye Pittsburgh, I’ll enjoy visiting you again, but it’s time to live somewhere else.

Goodbye Pittsburgh Part Two

Really, photos tell the Pittsburgh story best. It is a photogenic city, and I will probably miss that most of all.

Grey, overcast June day from West End Overlook

Mural in Troy Hill

Bloomfield with West Penn Hospital from under the Bloomfield Bridge in Polish HIll

Downtown and the Point from the water – Gateway Clipper Cruise, June 2015

Smithfield Street Bridge from Station Square. I love the infinity design of this bridge.

They love their dinos here. Near the radiology center in Shadyside.

Sculpture near the Braddock Carnegie Library.

From the West End Overlook on a cold, clear day in January.

Sculpture near the Oakland Carnegie Library.

Big old church in the Strip District.

Falling down church in the Larimer/East Liberty area.

Statue grave yard at the Mattress Factory.

Randy Land

Typical row of houses in Lawrenceville, PA

Woods…Frick Park.

Mural on Penn Ave in Garfield: From alley to hallway, from Negley to Fern two clans on the same land and no one returns the phone calls of the other (cause some folks never learn) whether latte or 40 whether player or punk unremember your learnings forget what you thunk cause times are a’ changin’ your myths are debunked it’s progress no losses cause everything’s fine. Davu Ayomi

Goodbye Pittsburgh Part One

The peonies have arrived. I’m so glad to spend May and June in Pittsburgh this last spring here, mostly to enjoy the flowers. It’s almost easy to forget winter when the peonies bloom.

See my post about last years peonies.
See the year before here.

Bloom Where You’re Planted – Part Four

Bloom Where You’re Planted – Part Four

We’ve been in Pittsburgh just shy of two years. I think it’s only been in the last six months or so that I have felt comfortable in this place and feel like getting from one place to another is second nature. I’ve found a dentist, and a doctor and a vet and I’m working and volunteering and I feel like I’m met a couple of friends too. But…it doesn’t necessarily feel like “home” and I am not sure it ever would. We travelled quite a bit this last year, and our trips to the west really did prove to us that we need to be living somewhere on the western side of the country. It is just home to us, and we feel best there. The draw of being close to family and to things we know and love is just to great for us to stay in Pittsburgh. So, although we’ll be moving west this year sometime, here is a list of the things I’ve learned I like about Pittsburgh and some things that have made it really hard to settle in here.

Pro’s

1. People – Folks in Pittsburgh are friendly. I think more so than in the west. There’s always a few cranky people anywhere you go, but for the most part, people here are welcoming and helpful.
2. Architecture – I am a fan of the cool houses and buildings in Pittsburgh. There is so much more history and charm here that makes neighborhoods and the city very interesting.
3. Work – Rich likes working with people in his office, and I have started working again and I really enjoy the people I work with and my clients. I think this is a great city for someone in my career, as I think massage therapy is growing here. It is convenient for Rich to travel overseas from here as well, that is a big plus.
4. Adventure – I’ve enjoyed getting to know Pittsburgh and the surrounding area. The history and topography are different and interesting. The last two years have been a learning experience, it’s been good for my brain to find new adventures and see new sights. I love the Phipps Conservatory and the Carnegie Library and the Heinz History Center. I particularly enjoyed McConnell’s Mill, Raccoon Creek State Park, Lake Moraine and Lake Erie.
5. Personality – Pittsburgh has personality. I like its quirks. The Pittsburghese, the narrow, crooked and winding streets, the unique neighborhoods, the parking chair, the sports fandom…these are all charming to me.

Con’s

1. Distance from Family – It has been disconcerting to be so far away from family. I don’t bond easily with new people, so I think I need my family more than some people might. I don’t need to live next door to them (necessarily), but closer would be better.
2. Weather – This last year was better than the first year we were here, more mild both during the summer, and so far, this winter too. But, I’m still not a fan of the grey skies and the humidity. I miss truly blue-sky days.
3. Trash/Garbage/Grit – One of the hardest things for me. If it had been cleaner here, I would have had a much easier time adjusting to life here. It is just a fundamentally different philosophy about garbage and recycling and not messing up where you live.
4. Driving/Getting Around – Narrow roads and huge potholes. The roads just aren’t very well taken care of here. It’s a minor thing and I could live with it, but I’d rather not.
5. Noise – We live on a busy noisy street and our squeaky floors STILL drive me crazy. Granted, this could have been solved by simply moving to a quieter neighborhood and a less noisy house, so I’m not sure it really should count against Pittsburgh in general, but in our situation, it was a definite con.
6. Physical Symptoms – Going out to eat is a treat, and I haven’t found my place(s) here. Despite everyone we know in Pittsburgh raving about the food, it tastes bland to me plus half the time we go out to eat, I feel sick. I think I’ve also caught more colds/viruses here too, and don’t get me started on the flu I had last year…I don’t remember ever being that sick. My allergies have been better here, but overall, I just don’t feel truly well here. I can’t always put my finger on it, but I can’t ignore that I don’t feel my best here.

I have been very sad lately that Pittsburgh hasn’t worked out for us. I really, really wanted it to. And, I feel like I’ve invested of myself in Pittsburgh. I’m proud of the fact that I tried. And, I do like some things about Pittsburgh, which makes it even harder to wave the white flag and move away. I’ve been sad for weeks (months, really) and it is time to stop feeling sad that Pittsburgh isn’t a fit and to invest the energy in finding what is. I’ll keep you posted.

One Year in Pittsburgh

Bloom Where You’re Planted – Part Three

We arrived in Pittsburgh one year ago on March 10th. This last year has been one of incredible change, compromise and personal growth. It hasn’t been easy. I didn’t think it would be easy, but I also didn’t realize how the trajectory of difficulty would play out. I figured it would be hard at first and then as we settled in and learned the place it would become easier. I was caught off guard when the difficulty of living here increased over the last few months. Here’s a current list of the Pro’s and Con’s.

Pro’s

1. Work – Rich is working hard and I think mostly enjoys the job and the opportunity to work with people and collaborate on projects.
2. Training – I am plugging along in school and getting closer to being done. I am looking forward to starting a new career. It feels like an achievement – I’m proud of sticking out the uncomfortable aspects of being an older student and getting off my rear end and learning something new.
3. Exploring – We have taken advantage of our membership to the history center and the Phipps Conservatory to visit some other museums and historical places during their free February events. We have enjoyed experiencing some cultural and historical opportunities that Pittsburgh has to offer.
   
4. Growth – As my mom always said, these experiences build character. I’m becoming quite the character. But seriously, there is an aspect of change that does make you stronger and more empathetic and ultimately a better person.
5. Driving/Getting Around – We know our way around pretty well now. That just comes with time, I suppose. But, I’ve noticed we’ve adopted the local attitude that leaving your general area of town is too much of a hassle. We used to think that was funny, now I feel the same way. All the way to the southside? Ugh, I don’t think so. Ha!
6. Opportunity for Travel – We are planning on seeing some things on this side of the country that I’ve never seen. I’m looking forward to that and I don’t know as I would have been able to do that had we not moved here.

Con’s

1. Distance from Family – This will be the number one con forever. And, when sweet Lula died, it got a little more lonely here.
2. Weather – This winter was…interesting. It was cold and dark and gloomy. I mean polar-vortex cold, automatic-lights-coming-on-at-10 o’clock-in-the-morning dark and don’t-feel-like-leaving-the-house-on-the-weekend gloomy. Idaho was no picnic during the winter either, but at least we got out a little more. I miss snowshoeing more than I thought I would.
3. Trash/Garbage/Grit – The good news is that the snow covered up the trash for about a minute. I’m not sure it was worth it though.
   
4. Driving/Getting Around – Potholes you could lose your car in. Seriously.
5. Noise – We live on a busy noisy street and our squeaky floors STILL drive me crazy.
6. Work – Rich’s job is on the con list too because of the frustration with working with middle eastern companies and the pace at which they choose to work (slowly).
7. Home – I don’t care for renting. I don’t like sharing a house with someone else. It’s not that I don’t like our downstairs neighbor, I really do like her – she’s been an awesome neighbor. What I hate is feeling like I’m disturbing her every time I walk across the floor of my house. Sometimes, it sounds and feels like I’m going to fall right through the creaky floors into her apartment. There are times that I’d get up early and clean house if I was in my own home, but since I know that my neighbor will have to suffer my loud walking around…I just lie in bed waiting for a respectable hour to get up. I guess because this affects me just about every hour of every day, this is the one that is wearing on me the most. I’ve always been a homebody and not having a home I feel comfortable in is pretty awful.
   

It’s always hard to really weigh the pro’s and con’s, mostly because without funds (a job), the list would look a lot different. It is interesting to make a list, but it doesn’t tell the whole story. Some pro’s are weighted a bit heavier than some con’s and vice versa. I am grateful that there are as many pro’s as there are and that even the con’s are fairly benign. Things could be a whole lot worse, and I do remind myself of that frequently. I am pretty blessed to be able to even make out this list to complain and rejoice about my life in the first place.

Reflecting

Pool in the Youghiogheny River near Ohiopyle

I haven’t posted much on this blog lately. I’ve been busy, but I think more than that, I haven’t had a lot of positive things to say, so I’ve just been quiet. Our new life in Pittsburgh is moving along, but I’m struggling a bit feeling homesick and lonely.

School is taking up some of my time, and is providing opportunity to meet people and providing some social distraction. But, it is also a bit stressful and I am still wondering if I’m going down the right path toward a career. I don’t think it helps that nine of the 21 people in my class have dropped out. Some of my favorite folks in class quit, and I miss spending time with them.

I am hoping this is a temporary lull in enthusiasm for Pittsburgh and our new life and that I will resume my enjoyment of finding wonderful things about the city and western Pennsylvania. I guess I’ll keep you “posted”.

Pittsburgh – Six Month Status Update

Bloom Where You’re Planted – Part Two

We arrived in Pittsburgh six months ago yesterday. I have suffered doubts about whether this was the right move during the last three months. I think at six months, the new is wearing off and the day-to-day living is taking it’s toll on me. When we moved, we made a few different lifestyle changes at the same time. In hindsight, maybe that wasn’t such a good idea. Maybe the move was change enough. Nothing like shaking your whole routine up at once. Here’s a current list of the Pro’s and Con’s.

Pro’s

1. Work – Rich is liking his job, he likes what he is doing and feels good about the work he is doing. I think he likes working with people, instead of all by his lonesome in a home office.
2. Opportunity – There has been an opportunity for me to get some training for a new career. I suppose that existed in Idaho too, but it seems logical to get out of the house here and do it.
3. Things to Do – We have been enjoying getting to know the area. The history of this landscape is pretty amazing. We get out quite a bit, but there is still a lot to do. It is fun to look forward to seeing new things.
   
4. Nature – I see some signs of fall now, and I’m looking forward to seeing the trees change colors. The summer storms have been pretty awesome. We just don’t see rain storms like they have here in Idaho…very impressive.

Con’s

1. Distance from Family – I miss my family. Enough said.
2. Humidity – I was afraid of the humidity and with good reason. I didn’t think I’d like it, and sure enough, I don’t. Luckily, we haven’t had too many days that have been unbearable. But the worst night was also a night we were without power and I thought I was going to die. It wasn’t fun.
3. Trash/Garbage/Grit – Still struggling with this one. When I visited Boise just a week ago, it was so nice to not see trash everywhere. It bugs me because I think it could be better. There seems to be a certain laziness here when it comes to picking up trash. I’ve seen people just throw trash out their car windows more times than I can count here. You just don’t see that in Idaho.
   
4. Driving/Getting Around – I have done pretty well finding my way around here. However, when I was back in Idaho it reminded me how nice it is to know exactly where you are going, what roads will take you where and to not need a map or a phone to get you places. It’s a small thing, but huge.
5. Routines – We are enjoying finding new things to do, it is true. But, at the same time there is so much comfort in going to your favorite restaurant, or hiking your favorite trail, or camping in your favorite spot. We don’t have favorites here yet and it makes me sad. It doesn’t feel like home without favorites.
6. Noise – We live on a busy noisy street, there is remodeling construction going on near us that is noisy, and our squeaky floors drive me crazy.
7. Work – Rich’s job is on the con list too because of the frustration with working with middle eastern companies and the pace at which they choose to work (slowly).

As you can see the Con’s and outweighing the Pro’s. However, we came here for a job and so that is the biggest factor here. With no job or no work, the Pro and Con list doesn’t matter — it’s all just a matter of trying to get by. So, that skews it a bit. And, I might be more negative than usual as I type this because I haven’t been sleeping well. Maybe if I felt refreshed, I could find a few more things to put in that “Pro” column.

I miss…

This boy, and these mountains:

The many landscapes of Idaho:

And, of course, these folks (identities a bit obscured):

Singing the Blues (and the purples, pinks and whites)

I love Portland, Oregon. I have considered moving there several times in my life. My good friend lives there. It would be awesome to live near her again. I think Portland is just one of the prettiest, funnest, best big(ish) cities. Two things always stopped me from moving to Portland. Distance from my family was one. The second was the grey, rainy climate.

Pittsburgh reminds me of Portland in a lot of ways. They are both cities built around rivers. The bridges and the downtown areas are similar to me. Mostly though, it’s the grey, rainy days that remind me of Portland. I find it surprising that I moved to a rainy city when I avoided Portland all those years because of the rain. And, my family is a lot further away from Pittsburgh than Portland. In fact, I always secretly figured that I could lure my family to see me in Portland. I’m not so sure about them visiting Pittsburgh. Well, except for my stepson, but for him it would be more about visiting the Steelers than me or my husband.

Hydrangeas remind me of Portland and happy memories of visiting there. So, I enjoy seeing them bloom in all their glory here in Pittsburgh. It’s the rain, and the grey that makes them lovely and prolific. Take a look at these photos of the hydrangeas around my neighborhood. I am looking with intention for all the things that make me happy here.

Pittsburgh – Three Month Status Update

Bloom Where You’re Planted

We arrived in Pittsburgh three months ago today. Sometimes it feels like I just got here and sometimes it feels as though I’ve been here a lot longer than three months. Here are my thoughts on Pittsburgh and the move after three months.

Pro’s:

1. Diversity – I am enjoying living where there are all sorts of people, something that is very different from Idaho. Rich and I sat next to a couple at a restaurant that were speaking Flemish?, Dutch?, German? — I’m not even sure — but I like that you hear different languages and see people with different customs.
2. Happiness – Rich is happy with his job, his company seems very happy with him. We moved here for this job, it seems an important “Pro” that he is enjoying the work and doesn’t seem to regret the change.
3. New Experiences/Things To Do – There is something really positive to be said for simply getting out of my routine and seeing and doing new things. That is not to say that I’m not finding ways to do the things I liked in Idaho (hiking & biking specifically) but it is refreshing to mix in new things too. I think it’s been good for my brain.
4. Architecture – I really enjoy the architecture here, the buildings are amazing and it is fun to walk the neighborhoods and see the old houses. Every street seems to contain some historic gem.
5. Weather – I like having more rain than Boise, I like that the rain contributes to so much GREEN. I like that there are days with puffy clouds and the sunshine isn’t relentless.
6. Size/Charm of our Apartment – The size of our duplex apartment is just about perfect. We have plenty of storage (garage and basement) which really helps. But, the actual living space is really nice. If the third bedroom was as big as the other two, we could fit our office stuff in there with Lula Belle’s sleeping space and then we could use the dining room as a dining room. Then it would be the perfect amount of space. But really, I don’t miss the dining room, we eat at the island in the kitchen and I don’t expect we’ll entertain much in this apartment, so the size is really good. And, it has really charming features – nice woodwork, big windows, wood floors, cool doors, cool old light fixtures, a brand new kitchen, decent closet space, nice outdoor space.

Con’s:

1. Distance from Family – I miss my family. This is a very big “Con” for me. If I could pick up everyone that I love and just transport them here that would go a long way toward making this place seem like somewhere I could live for the rest of my life. It has been hard to be so far away.
2. Noise – We live on a busy street. It seems to be the thoroughfare in our neighborhood and it can be quite loud during rush hour especially. The front of the house is noisier, but the back, where the kitchen, deck, and bedroom is, is quite peaceful.
3. Trash/Garbage/Grit – I hate that there is so much trash everywhere. I am getting used to it somewhat, meaning I don’t have the urge to scour the neighborhood for trash every time I go out. But I will never like the fact that there is so much garbage just laying around. You would think that a city with so many rivers would really strive to control the litter and garbage. The garbage collection is so much different than Boise. I miss Boise’s recycling program especially. I loved that big blue bin, and was proud of the fact that our recycling was always more full than our garbage bin ever was. In Pittsburgh, you have to put all your recycling in blue plastic bags and set it out on the curb. It seems so backwards to buy more plastic to contain your recycling. The trash collection is really bad too, they don’t have the trucks with the arms that pick up the barrels because of all the on-street parking, which makes sense, but the guys that are dumping the trash barrels don’t seem to care if the trash they are dumping makes it into the truck or not. So, there’s always trash left all over the street on trash day. Then, it blows around into all the bushes and lawns. It’s gross.
   
4. Traffic – Well, no surprise, there’s more traffic here than in Boise. I’m learning the Pittsburgh driving customs, and I’m doing my best to assimilate. But, I still don’t like the amount of traffic, the very narrow streets, and the potholes (OMG, the potholes).
5. Food – I miss Mexican food. I figured it would be hard to find Mexican food here, and it is and it pains me.
6. Weather – Yes, you read that right, weather appears on both sides of this list. I don’t like the humidity and sometimes the clouds aren’t puffy, they are gloomy and gray and make me sad. You know it’s bad when your automatic lights are coming on at 2:00 in the afternoon on an especially cloudy day. In May, mind you, not December.
7. Apartment – I love the charm of our apartment, it is true. I like the way the wood floors look, they are oak and I like that they aren’t too dark and they aren’t too light. I DON’T like that they are so loud. The loudness of the floors has made us change our routines and habits. The loudness makes me cringe when I know our downstairs neighbor (a hardworking physician) is home after many, many hours of work at the hospital and is probably trying to sleep as I’m walking around in our creaky floors. I would also like to have an electrical outlet in my bathroom. I also miss central cooling and a laundry that isn’t in a basement.

Right now, the Pro’s outweigh the Con’s but I’m still not sure that will always be so. I think being so far from family will only weigh heavier and heavier as time goes on. I am aware that at this point, it feels a bit like I’m just on an adventure. I’m not sure when it will feel like this is permanent and I am afraid that when it does, missing family will become too much for me. I am planning a visit to Idaho in the fall, and I wonder how I will feel going back to Idaho, will I want to return to Pittsburgh? For now, I’ll just enjoy the fun I’m having exploring a brand new place and learning new things. Time will tell if this is the permanent place for me.